The people around you have everything to do with the decisions you make; that’s why it’s important to know the difference between temps and lifetime if you are to succeed in life. Falling in and be loved is one of the most exciting experiences I have had the privilege to enjoy. But I can’t say the same for falling out of it. Many of us have tasted the painful sting of a breakup/s and to most of us because we failed to understand love or differentiate between part-timers and full-timers, well I won’t spare you the heartache in your next venture.
Now, very many people have come out to define what love is including what I once wrote about love languages, how to choose life a partner and questions to ask before you say “I do.” In short, I like best 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 definition of love;
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hope, and always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”
As you can see, its hard work to actually love unlike the Hollywood reductions of love to just a feeling, so love is a relationship!! Ignorance of this onetime left me hurt just I also did to others but doesn’t have to be like that. In life, there are three kinds of people that will come into your life, those who want to hurt you, just have fun and those who want to grow with you. The older you get in life, the more you start thinking about building strong foundations and having a grasp of responsibilities. What that means, you start thinking about long-term leaving less room for short-term, colorless dreams, tamed visions or mediocracy. Your focus is in having spiritual, physical, mental, emotional, professional, financial and social stability. Hence, it’s a tipping point in life where you define who you are and what you and for. In doing so, you have to choose your team, from your confidants, constituency, comrades and also know your well-wishers and enemies of any.
People Who Come to Hurt You
They are everywhere in great supply and may hurt you consciously or unconsciously. Some in form of friends hating glow you have going on so they fight to destroy it. But those you must be very keen on, are the ignorant ones, they may be good people but absolutely lack the moral strength, wisdom, and discipline to love you. You become their learning ground in the process of your pain.
Those to Come To Have Fun
Time after time, I have fallen in love with this category of people, who wouldn’t want to have fun right? Anyway, as we have all come to discover, life is not just a fun. I want to us an example in parenting to explain; having a baby is an experience, but Raising a child is a Relationship**wow, this is deep**. In the same way, people in this category look for experiences and are scared of going all the way. A majority will love your company, excitement, fun activities, you mention it all… for their satisfaction. They will leave you the second it’s not fun for them anymore.
And Who Choose to Grow With You
Now, these are people who have learned and attained the discipline ability to say no to the lesser and yes to the greater. Unlike those who like you because of your strengths, people who choose to grow with you, love you despite all your weaknesses. They are willing to put in what it takes to be with you. It’s important to note that they are not perfect, they may hurt you as well. The difference is, they have the decency to apologize and make it up to you, and they will love and honor you.
In conclusion, people come and go, but your mission and vision must be constant. Never fall in love with temps or part-time lovers. Don’t sell yourself short. So do not waste time with people who are not ready to grow with you or help you attain the life both deserving. Never regret hard times, profit from it by gaining wisdom. In life, what happened or what you have done is no longer in your control. But the present and practice of healthy choices for today and tomorrow, that’s in your power!! As we all struggle against who we were and who we are, we get tired of fighting that we faint not outside but in our mind. Don’t let it get to you, smile in the light, you will be sustained with praying in the dark.